Wednesday, April 6, 2011
I don't know what the hell it is about you, that keeps me up EVERY. Single. Night. Wishing you were mine. I still think about you constantly, and everytime I see you my heart goes crazy. I honest to god, don't have a clue what I see in you. And sure as hell can't describe it, but the feelings I have for you I've never felt for anyone before. And I can't, no matter how hard I try, forget about you like everyone wants me to. It won't happen now, or anytime soon. And it kills me that I have to live with these crazy feelings for you, when I've felt all along that you have at least a sliver of that amount of feeling for me. Fuck you for calling me pretty. Fuck you for inviting me to go across the world with you. Fuck you for inviting me to your house. Fuck you for asking for my phone number. Fuck you for smashing my heart into 10 million pieces. I have no one to talk to about my feelings for you. I'm alone. Wishing that I never would have found out the truth, I would have rather lived in mystery, than be this heartbroken. Everyone thinks i'm just exaggerating and being dramatic, but I like you more than words can describe. I have a lot of love to give, and I've always been like that. I've never met someone more loving than I am. It's the only thing I'm good at. And I feel like I'm wasting it all on you. Every text I get, every notification and message I see, I hope are from you. And they never are. I don't know how much longer I can live like this.